self serve

I like mornings and nights
up close
because there you look most like other men I know, but
(strange to use the word 'men', but now)

still retaining that
uninterpretable allure
of daytime light --
which I like the most
(and which likes me least)
so I'll win twice
I'll see each half
I'll know both edges
I have all of each end and nothing in between


and then I will alone
I will alone
and I can pry
when she leaves the table
(I'll face that way deliberately)
into eyes the colour of antarctic winds
set amidst black shadows and blank stares
There is no guilt
because I
know the rules.