an anagram of 'perfect'

He wonders how far is too far. He challenges the limits, the boundaries.

He asks himself these questions when he’s afraid he’s fucked the answer. He knows questions cause trouble but he pushes the boundaries anyway. The other side of the line beckons him..

Who they think he is when he stands before them, a mass of 850;
When he organises and delegates and promotes and advocates;
When he is orderly, model and in control –

He is not.

The biggest shock of their lives is when they find him stumbling around their territory on Friday nights, torso bare, shirt discarded, squirming on the floor in their bed covers.
Unleashed just like the rest of them.

He delights in this knowledge.

It is not a façade, it’s a context.
It’s a decision. To be this person here and this person, here.
It’s two sides of himself. Each equally as legit as the other.

All of this, he understands.